Ai the Health Nut
by Derpyotaku
Summary: Ai always thought that his band mate's snacking habits were unnecessary to their diet, so he took it upon himself to make some minor changes.


"No."

"Aw, c'mon Ai-Ai. It's not like I ate that much."

"You got heavier." Reiji pouted. He was being lectured on eating too much junk food after Ai saw him eating a bunch of fried foods. It did not really help that he found out that he gained two pounds. Just two.

Ai stared at him blankly. "According to my data, eating too much junk food can cause health problems, so-"

"Well your so-called data is wrong Ai-chan! I did not gain weight. Nor it isn't causing me some serious problems!" Reiji exclaimed as he waved his arms around. "At the moment…"

Ai glared at him for his interruption, which Reiji put up his hands defensively. "So starting today, I'm getting rid of all junk foods in this dorm." Then he proceeded to walk to the kitchen.

"Ai-ai!" Reiji ran after him.

 **A few days later...**

"Kotobuki, what did you do now."

Reiji jumped at Camus' seething tone and sweat dropped as he was glaring at him immensely. "Ahaha, I can explain..."

"Explain what, that all of my stash of pastries are gone!? Kotobuki, if you ate them all-"

"Now Camus, don't blame him for it. I was the one that got rid of all your pastry supply." Camus turned his head to Ai, who just came into the kitchen. "I have decided that we need to slim down on the junk food, so I removed every type of junk, and that is including your sweets."

"So that's why all of my chips were gone." The three turned their heads to the silver-haired rocker that just walked into the kitchen, very unhappy.

"That includes you too, Ranmaru."

He glared at the android. "Hey, just because that stupid maracas idiot so happened to gain weight, doesn't mean you have to include me, too!"

"I agree with Kurosaki. This needs to be stopped." Camus added.

Ai looked to the three. "First of all, eating too much sweets is bad for your teeth, you will have a higher chance of getting cavities and diabetes. Second, chips is full of salts, fat, and oils, so you will gain needless fat and that is definitely a no. Until one of you, specifically Reiji, will get back into the preferred weight, I'm banning all junk food." Then he walked away from his band mates.

After the android left the kitchen, Ranmaru and Camus glared at Reiji. "You better fix this idiot/fool."

Reiji shrunk as he felt a menacing aura from the two. "H-hey, I wasn't the only one that got their junk food taken away. Why can't we just discuss about this and try to do something?"

"No." The two proceeded to walk out of the kitchen, ignoring his useless antics.

"W-wait! I just got an idea, guys!" Reiji ran after the two.

 **A few nights later**

Ai was sleeping peacefully until he heard shuffling outside in the hallway. ' _Huh_?' He slowly sat up as his hair covered some of his face. He glanced over at his digital clock and read the time. "2 AM? Who would be up so late?" He mumbled. ' _This is really messing up my schedule._ '

He got out of bed, not bothering to tie up his usual hairstyle, and put on his slippers and quietly walked out of the room, trying not to wake his kouhais sleeping across the room. He closed the door quietly and walked down the moonlit hallway and saw a dim light coming out from the kitchen. "Hm?"

Ai walked into the kitchen only to find, ' _Nothing_.' He looked around and saw from across the room that the fridge was open. He tilted his head in confusion and walked to the other side of the kitchen. Ai strode to the fridge and was about to close it until he saw three heads out of the corner of his eye. He turned his head and his eyes slightly widened as he saw Reiji, Ranmaru, and Camus on the floor, eating...jello?

The three of them turned around and their eyes widened, save Camus who was still in the process of savoring his dessert. "Oh crap." Ranmaru mumbled. Definitely got caught.

Ai stared at them in disbelief. "According to my data, you three should be sleeping. Is it clearly too late to be up at this hour, eating at that too."

Reiji, who quickly came out of his shock, offered marine jelly to Ai. "Do you want some Ai-Ai? It's your favorite." Ranmaru and Camus looked at him disbelievingly at his sudden offer as Ai looked at him with lowered lidded eyes. "Now why would I want to mess up my eating schedule? That isn't part of my database."

Reiji ignored his weird 'database' thing and smiled at him. "Aw, come on Ai-chan! Have you ever heard of a midnight snack?"

"It's 2:15 in the morning, Reiji." Ai pointed out.

He laughed awkwardly. "Well, late night snack then. Now come on! I know you want it." He taunted as he waved the jelly in front of his face.

Ai stared at him hesitantly. Contemplating, he sighed and gave in. "Alright, just this once. Then after this night, no more junk food."

Reiji and Ranmaru sighed in relief while Camus nodded in approval as he kept eating his jello. "Sure, whatever you say, Ai-Ai."

...

"I see you're also gaining weight, Ranmaru. I'll be taking note of that."

Ranmaru choked on his jello. "Shut up!"

 _ **END**_

 **A/N:** Oh Ai, he does not know the savory taste of junk food. Jk, it's bad for you. But he wouldn't know, he doesn't gain weight.

 _904 words_


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